FoodNetArchive

The hearthstone; or, Life at home

1883

Page 212

Presented as published in 1883. Historical recipes may not meet modern food-safety standards. Cook from the modern interpretation, not the original instructions.
When once it becomes known to your neighbors that you reg;:rd life as intended for something more than a gossips' paradise, and tha;; you devote the morning and evening hours to duties and culture, and the afternoons to out-door exercise, the regular critics of every- body but themselves will, after some fierce assaults upon your privac)-, let you severely alone. Of course, they will avenge their slighted conversation by pitying comments on you to each other. They will say you have no spirit in you and are content to let the world take its own course, so long as you can keep your own home tidy and manage your own affairs smoothl}-. They will call you a drudge. and say you have no soul. But the very best people in this world 324 THE hearthstone; or, life at home. are those who keep their souls to themselves and work as regularly as if they hadn't any. It is really a great compliment to be pro- nounced wanting in public interest and spirit by the village gossips. All you care for is to be let alone by them, and the only way to accomplish this happy result is to keep them at a respectful distance with the pins and needles, the bodkins and darning-needles, and the domestic duties that are a woman's best protection, as they are her truest happiness. But having established order in your home by keeping yourself and your children free from intrusion during hours of duty and study, let there be times when you receive and return visits. Be glad to see those who are glad to see you. Be chatty and agreeable, but let your tongue be eloquent in speaking good of others and silent as to their faults. Above ajl, never meddle with the private affairs of others in your conversation, unless you are prepared that they should make free with yours. Let your talk be such as leaves a pleasant, not a sour, taste in the mouth, and cultivate the company of those who leave behind them pleasant and kindly impressions. Not only is the human voice the most tremendous of all social in- fluences in the world, so that the spoken word really never dies, but spreads in ever-widening circles of effect, but the influences of con- versation for good or ill upon the minds of a whole family, children or full grown, is most important in the conduct and happiness of life. The conversation must depend upon the company. It is useless to cast pearls before swine, or talk of literature and art, the beauties of scenery or the delights of reading to those who have no taste for them. Choose for your friends those in whose presence you feel cheered and improved, not those with whom every interchange of sentences is a labor and a weariness. Be mistress of your own house, and let no one use your home as they would a tavern or a club ; but be hospitable to the right sort of people, who know that there is a time to call and a time to stay away, a time for condolence or congratulation, and a time for silence and solitude. Sometimes all company is oppressive ; for not only does the heart know its own sor- COMPANY IN THE HOME. 325 rows but its own joys, and one's own kith and kin, still more a stranger, cannot share our inmost feelings.